Classic Trig

Her eyes rolled back behind her closed lids. Her breathing stunted and hummed as I swam my fingers in and out of her. She grabbed the back of my head, her fingers running in my hair as she pulled my face towards hers and into her lips. Our mouths moved together until she whispered in my ear, “. . . I want you.”

She pulled me onto my back, my shoulders driving into the pillows. She mounted me, kissed me, and pushed my shoulders back. I felt her fingers slowly trailing down my chest across my stomach. She pulled my boxers down slightly. Her fingers tightly wrapped around the stem of my dick, pointing it upwards; inches toward the opening of her canal.

It’s been less than 1 week. Actually it’s been one day less than a week since I said I was in love. And it was true, I was in love. Spoiledly infatuated and nestled into my own special corner. But, it was Monday night that I called her and she didn’t pick up. And, it was Monday night that I decided to freeze her out.

The past week would be a roller coaster of awful decisions and persistent hope. After a long labor day weekend, I was just touching the surface of how hard it must be for anyone who understands themselves to be a Pick Up Artist to suddenly drift into love, pull over and settle. And let me tell you from recently personal experience; it’s hard. . . real hard!

I had frozen out Capricorn and I was at the DMV. I waited 2 hours already, and I was 10 people away from being seen. I immediately took an open chair. The girl, who was Chinese, sitting next to me was reading a hard cover book. I thought I saw the author on the cover.

“I LOVE AMY TAN!” I said as vulgarly obnoxious as possible. The girl looked up at me with a puzzling confused stare. “Your book, Amy Tan?” I clarified.

She pulled the cover over. The first name was Ashley and the last name was something that wasn’t “Tan.” I was wrong. It wasn’t Amy Tan.

“Oh!” I said embarrassed. I smiled in good manner and said, “I just saw that you were Chinese so you must be reading Amy Tan.”

Her face pulled back away from me, “Stereotypical are we?” she said with an offended yet intrigued roll of her eyes.

“Nope,” I said, “Just racist.” She laughed.

My game has been burning the confidence it deserves to have ever since I fell in love with Capricorn. I’ve been telling people that Capricorn was my girlfriend and that I was in a relationship to The Attraction Forums, but I was simply just deeply enthralled into it that I was acting stupid. I could see the way I didn’t care about results and routines, and because I just wanted people to talk to me, I ended up throwing kino out the door and it really didn’t matter because I was getting people high off verbal touch. And man, was my verbal touch inappropriately tasteful.

I met Katherine on Tuesday; the one at the DMV. I met another girl, Elizabeth at City College who’s a very nice young lady also, and Middle Eastern. The same day that Elizabeth met me she sent me a text saying:

HB: Hey its liz from earlier today. I have to take a test at 11 tonight so I can’t call. Nice meeting you today though! Maybe we can do lunch sometime.

I was skipping down the streets of my game in full throttle, all the while thinking of Capricorn.

I called Katherine earlier today in between classes. We chatted for no more than 3 minutes. I called her again later that night around 8pm. We chatted for a bit. She mentioned that she was going out to the city tonight to hang out at a gay club. Parties aren’t my thing, and neither are homo things. We chatted for a bit, she wanted me to hang out with her and her friends, but I was kind of hesitant, plus I didn’t want to seem like I didn’t have anything awesome going on. I told her that I would call her back and eventually said I would go. But on one condition.

“Hey if I hang out with you, you have to promise me something?” I said to her before I agreed to meet up with her.

“Yeah sure what?”

I stunned and hummed over the phone before I cleared my throat, “You can’t have sex with me.”

“What?” she said confused.

“We can’t have sex tonight," I said indefinitely.

“Oh yeah," She laughed nervously, "That’s fine. I wouldn't have sex with you anyways,” she laughed and laughed and tried to work her way out of thinking that she would want to have sex with me.

I had to find a ride to the Bart Station because I couldn’t drive my car with a suspended registration. I could’ve taken the risk of getting towed or pulled over but I’m already in deep shit with other things.

I scrambled around my parking lot in the hope that I knew someone with a slight relevance to my life so I could bum a ride off them. No one showed up. I got a sandwich at the subway slash gas station across the street in hope to find a ride from someone. That didn’t work. I was calling everyone I knew, I was bothering everyone, I was being stupid. I finally saw a very very not so close acquaintance at Walgreens and worked my way into getting a ride.

We were sitting in the car and after awhile I told him that I’m a social dynamics specialists. He asked him to give him a lesson, and I threw out as much social dynamic jargon to seem like I can diffuse a terrorist threat. We reached the Bart Station and I got on the train. I was eating my Subway sandwich next to a girl with long legs wearing really short running shorts. It looked like she wasn’t wearing pants. She wore glasses and was reading a book. Half of her screamed naughty nerd, and the other half screamed tight smooth long super duper sexy legs.

The train stopped and I had Subway garbage in my hand. As soon as the train doors open I jumped up, walked out of the train, threw my garbage away, and came back into the train; all the while with my messenger bag sitting on the seat.

It was three stops away to where I needed to be from where I started. I was already at one stop away. I couldn’t open the girl earlier because I was busy eating a sandwich.

I walked up to her, “Hey,” I said, she looked up, “Do you have a pen?”
“Yeah,” she replied.

My phone was dying and I didn’t want to lose Katherine’s number. I took the pen that the girl gave me and started writing Katherine’s number onto my arm. “Hey I just got to say,” I said all the while writing with her pen on my arm, “the whole ‘no pants’ thing, is incredibly sexy!”

“Oh thank you,” she said, “That was really daring what you did over there, running out of the train to throw your garbage out and leaving your bag here.”

“Oh. . .” I really couldn’t say anything. I really didn’t want to say the cliché line, ‘well I’m a daring guy,’ because I felt like I would be a little over the top. And moronic.

“Hey,” I said, “so my stop is actually the next stop and you’re incredibly beautiful.” She said thank you. “I would totally love to bullshit with you and everything, but I really do have to get off at the next stop,” I said. “Do you want to talk sometime?” I pulled out my phone and handed it to her.

“I have a boyfriend.”

“That’s cool,” I said, “so you’re a Virgo.”

“Yeah how’d you know?”

“I just know these things.”

“Yeah, my birthday’s in like 4 days. That was really cool how you just guessed that.”

“4 days?” I said repeating her.

“Yep!”

“Here stand up! I’ll give you a birthday hug!”

She melted, laughed, and smiled. She stood up and gave me a tight one. We were already reaching my stop. “You’re amazing,” I said. She smiled.

“Let me see something?” I took my index finger and ran it up the inside of her bare thigh. “That’s sooo sexy!”

She laughed “You are too much!”

“I know!” I said walking out the Bart train doors. I stood outside the window and waved goodbye continuously shaking my hand in a silly manner. She reciprocated and continued to wave her hand silly too until the train moved forward and seperated both of us.

I was waiting for 20 minutes at the station before Katherine showed up. She called me telling me that she’s no longer going to take the train and that she was going to drive there instead. I said, okay. I met up with her and got into her Volvo. She was wearing an orange tanktop top with buttons and gray jeans.

We talked and talked while we were driving into the city, mostly on random stuff. No routines. I teased her a lot. We passed by a park and she mentioned how she had sex in that very same park on a tree. We started talking about the craziest places we’ve ever had sex. And then we were just talking about sexual naked things, like threesomes, streaking, skinny dipping yadda yadda, a lot of good stuff. I’ve disqualified her a lot and kept my frame rather selfish.

She already told me that the friend that we were meeting up with was super gay, and emphasized the super duper gayness of his gayness. I told her that it would be fine and that I wouldn’t get offended too much. And of course once we pick him up he’s talking about how he likes to give head and what types of penis does he like to put in his mouth. It’s cool though. I really don’t have anything against gay people and it seriously doesn’t bother me.

We’re at Safe way. We buy wine and chips ahoy cookies, the ones with the mixed white chocolate and milk chocolate cookies mixed together. We’re walking down the aisle and Katherine says that I’m gay and I like men, so I slap her ass. She laughs playfully. Were standing in the longest grocery line I have ever seen. As we finally make it up to the register, the cash registry person can already see I’m impatiently waiting to blow my fucking brains out because the line was too long. I go up to pay for my chocolate chip cookies and Katherine stops me. She pulls out her credit card and smiles, “I’ll pay for it!”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah!”

I smile at the registry person, “Yep she’s that type of girl!”

The cash registry guy laughs, “Eww I don’t even like you,” Katherine says.

“Just because you ain’t getting any from me tonight!” I say.

“Not like I would want any from you!”

I look at the cash registry guy once again, “Yep!” I say, “She’s that type of girl.”

We head back over to the house we were originally at to drink at the house. The gay friend is named Munn. I try to chat it up with him the whole time, basically building some social proof and not seem like I'm annoyed by him. We’re sitting in the living room of a very nice San Francisco living room. Nice San Francisco houses are hard to come by. I told Katherine that I wasn’t drinking tonight so Katherine and Munn are drinking Burgundy wine together in wine glasses. The house owner wakes up and tells us we should go downstairs and not wake him up. We sit around downstairs and play, “never have I ever.” I end up drinking because that’s the renumerative drawback of the “have I ever” part.

“What time is it?” Katherine asks Munn.

He looks over to his phone, “it’s eleven thirty.”

“Oh we should be leaving soon. . .”

What? We’re still leaving? It’s eleven thirty and were still going to head out to the gay club. Katherine and Munn stand up. I’ve drank three full glasses of wine, and I don’t feel too good. But it doesn’t matter, we’re on our way out of the house. Katherine is sitting in the living room after I use the bathroom, and Munn is getting something before we leave. I grab Katherine and tell her to give me a twirl.

“Are you trying to dance with me?” she says her eyes mellowed out and staring into mine. I throw her half a twirl and slap her butt. She backs up into me and we do a little freaky dance as I hold her hip and neck. We laugh and start walking out of the house, still waiting for Munn.

Katherine slowly pulls the door closed, even though we’re still waiting for Munn. My back is leaning on the staircase as were waiting.

“So. . . Jon,” she asks me, “. . . what’s your deal?”

I look at her slightly, “What do you mean?”

She walks straight up to me; our bodies slightly touching each others. My hands are holding onto the ledge. I’m not wrapping them around her and I’m not showing her any adorability. “What’s. . . your. . . deal?” she says again suggestively looking at me. She places her face underneath my chin and above my collarbone. I feel her lips softly being placed onto my neck. Munn comes out. Katherine spins around as if nothing happened. Katherine starts walking down the stairs and I follow her as Munn locks the front door.

We’re walking down Haight street in search of another liquor store before we get onto the bus. I’m talking to Munn about STD’s and how he seems to be able to avoid them. Supposedly he’s had sex with over 50 men. He uses a condom when he gives head. Katherine is falling behind because she’s on the phone. I extend my hand to her and she intertwines her fingers in mine. We walk down the street. We reach the liquor store. We run after the bus.

Katherine and Munn are trying to get me to drink again. Katherine has an alcoholic drink containing caffeine, so I can’t drink that because it’ll kill me. Munn has a lager. I end up drinking the lager. I kind of don’t feel comfortable drinking from the same can as him, or practically anyone else. But especially because he’s had sex with 50 guys, you start thinking is this what it is to smoke 50 dicks?

We get off at some stop in Market. For anyone who’s unrelated to San Francisco, where we started was Haight. Haight is the highlighted tourist street of San Francisco filled with a lot of thrift stores and bars. Market is the financial district. It’s the epicenter of the business part of San Francisco.

We’re walking down a street off Market. It’s about midnight by now. Munn is still talking about the guy were meeting up with. The guy is supposedly really really short, he’s a bouncer, and on countless occasions had asked Katherine and Munn to get into a threeway with him. I guess he likes to go direct.

We’re walking off Market when Katherine needs to use the bathroom.

“Just go in here,” Munn says pointing to the hotel right next to us. I open the door for Katherine and walk in with her. It’s a high end hotel and as long as we don’t talk and stay completely honest we won’t get into any trouble. As I’m walking Katherine takes my hand and wraps her fingers around mine.

“What’s up?” I ask.

“What? I just don’t want to get in trouble. . .”

I sigh, “Ummm okay.”

We check the left side of the hotel, it’s a restaurant. No bathroom. We walk all the way to the right side of the bathroom. Still no bathroom. I ask a couple that’s walking around and they don’t know but they say we should try to look around the registry area. So we go and we find. She goes into the girl’s room, and I go into the boy’s.

. . . Capricorn.

It was only last weekend. How could she be in love with me? There’s no way that she can possibly be in love with me the same way I’m in love with her. It was one weekend together, a full 24 hours of us hanging out and sharing ourselves and being ourselves and being with each other. That’s all I really want. I want her. I want a friend that I can kiss and hug and wrap my arms around at night. I want that freedom. I want to be trapped in her. But she doesn’t feel the same way.





“Is anyone in there?” I ask Katherine as I slightly open the women’s bathroom door.

“Uhhh NO!” she says, her voice echoing the bathroom walls.

I walk in and look at her, “Hey!” I say as I grab the back of her head and pull her waist into mine. I bend my lips down towards hers.

She gets distracted and shifts away as I’m pulling into her. She turns back and pulls towards me, but I’m not pulled into her anymore. I pull back and she’s not pulled into me anymore. Whatever! She takes my hand and walks me out of the girl’s bathroom.

I pull her hand forcefully into my body and push her body onto the wall next to the bathroom door. I could see her teeth biting the inside of her lower lip as I pull her face upwards and I come down to hers. She’s smiling.

She tastes like butter. Someone walks in on us as I’m pinning Katherine onto the walls our mouths moving up and around each others. I pull off of Katherine’s lips. There’s a concierge guy who gives us a smiting look. Katherine takes my hand and pulls me out of there.

. . . To be continued (as usual)

-Written 9-13-2009